Thursday, September 25, 2008

Tainted.

When I am down or tired, like this morning. I like to check out a few of my favorite internet sites to spark a little laughter or conversation with friends and coworkers.

One of my favorites involves cute puppies and kittens. Yes, I am that person. A girl that is soothed by small cute things and bonus points if they are furry. Things that also help: cute babies, travel websites, and retail shopping outlets.

But on that website linked above there is a thread that I am uncomfortable with. Let's just say it rhymes with hat. I have enough of that keeping me up at night, I don't want my pick-me-up time tainted.

So Chris, if you are listening, please move on to a different thread. I could use a little break. You have forced me to go to my backup plan.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Time to chill.

Everyone is on edge.

People are tense.

You can feel it in the air.

It's time to relax. We will vote. Half of us will be upset. We will have to move on and make change anyway. Anyhow.

The sky will not fall.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

RIP: Pam the Deck-Whore



I have a theory.

The theory is that some of the subtler parts of our lives are actually as important to us as the big things: the passions, the relationships, the career.

Case in point: Pam the Deck-Whore.

Pam the Deck-Whore is a feral cat. One that lived at the home of a couple that is close friends with one of my coworkers. I have never met this couple, although they sound so fun - I totally want to meet them. And I never met Pam.

Regardless, this was the conversation last night walking home:

Coworker: I have bad news.

Me: What.

Coworker: Pam the Deck Whore was hit by a car.

Me: (Gasp) What! What about the kittens!?!

Coworker: They handed them off to the SPCA last week.

Me: Oh, gosh, maybe she committed suicide. That's so sad.

Coworker: They are upset about it.

And I thought "I am upset about it!" Imagining this poor cat, first losing her kittens and then being hit by a car. My heart went out to the couple who was close to her.

Ridiculous? Probably. But that's just who I am.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

White Privilege

Has everyone seen this wonderful article?

There is no escaping the truths in this article. It may be uncomfortable for those that seem themselves and their judgements in here, but we have to be able to see the truth in this in order to make the world a different place.

Tim Wise, you rule!

Friday, September 12, 2008

Getting stood up. Oh and xanax.

I love working with students. I love them. They are so appreciative. They are so hard-working. They are so forgetful. This time of year, I pack my schedule with 6 or 7 appointments a day and often times students simply forget.

For this I'm grateful.

Days like today, when I'm tired or emotional or overwhelmed with stuff, I really count on having some extra time to linger on special projects, catch up with stuff, and well... unleash some words and feelings from my brain.

This week I have been stood up by two of my favorite students. Each time I felt conflicted. Happy for the time, sad at not having the time to hear their plans, their goals, and their progress. I get over it quickly when I realize I have time to check email or follow up on a forgotten pile of stuff on my desk.

Now: Xanax.

I had an MRI yesterday. Nothing serious, just checking stuff out... a little internal inventory of sorts.

Problem: I hate them.

Enter Xanax. And a sweet nurse that gave me the best visualization exercise ever and problem solved!!! I didn't hyperventilate. I didn't cry. I didn't die. Instead I mentally built my dream house by the beach and let the "jackhammer" that horrible MRI sound help me add a feeling of reality to the process.

Why does no one talk about that feeling that happens during an MRI - that feeling of things moving on an almost cellular level - the pulling sensation? It's crazy.

Alright, happy weekend to you all. Kisses and more next week...

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Reading the wrong thing at the wrong time.

I'm having book club remorse. I had forgotten how disturbing, tragic and emotional AGE OF IRON is. Sorry folks, but it's still so packed with topics that we need to discuss more in our lives that I won't change my mind, BUT... we may all need to follow-up with my second choice which was the 13 1/2 lives of Captain Bluebear.

So after finishing the first half of Age of Iron again last night, I clicked on a story at my wonderful Washington Post and read a story of a 66 year old Dad that jumped into a sewage tank to save his youngest son. The Dad passed away and the young son, who has Downs syndrome, is in critical condition with double pneumonia. I cannot imagine the grief of the mother and the other six children in the family. Well, I can a little and that's why I'm sitting here crying at my desk.

One of my favorite alums is coming in 15 minutes, so I will try to cheer up!!! Quick, someone tell me a knock-knock joke.

Actually, to end on a happier note, yesterday I had lunch with a 4 year old. There were like 10 other people at the table too, but my rapt attention was on the cutie. He kept tapping me on the arm and saying "Let me tell you something funny..." and then saying something that didn't quite make sense. It was awesome. He is so smart and fun. Okay... I feel better now.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

On Asking for Help, Campfires, and Books.

First thing, Most people hate to ask for help - I know. Some people hate even small asks like "I want new roller shades and need help finding patterned ones"... well, I hear you...I have had to ask for alot of help lately: first this weekend I got stranded and had to call to get a ride when a stupid, stupid cab company decided that picking people up and getting paid for it was NOT what they wanted to do for a living, instead they decided that they might prefer to tell people to wait for an hour or so and then suggest they walk home... but not use words that have it come across as nicely as I said it. Now I need help to go to a doctor's appointment. I feel very guilty. I never want to feel like work to the people I love. But today I feel like maybe I'm beginning to feel like work to them. I should probably talk to them about this instead of the internet, but you all are such good listeners. Man, it's like therapy except quieter.

Next thing, I am kind of a lazy cook. I can make good things once and awhile, but given the choice between picking up take-out and a preparing a three-course meal, I will always choose take-out. So when I find articles on the internet that describe things like Camp Fire Cream Puffs, I think "um, I want this person who created this amazing thing to come to all my campfires." And "I will never be the person who creates these amazing things."

Now, if someone were to start using Camp Fire Cream Puff as my new nickname, it would totally make sense. ... Soft and sweet and way too fancy for camping... Feel free - use it... I won't even flinch.

Thirdly and most importantly, my sweet and gorgeous friend Gina is back in PA! Welcome back Gina! Not only has she been busy doctoring, but she's found time to have the two of the cutest, most wonderful children ever. AND she wants to start a book club. Well, I LOVE BOOKS! AND CLUBS! AND APPARENTLY CAPITAL LETTERS AND EXCLAMATION POINTS! So if there are any lurkers out there that are totally normal, living in the Delaware Valley, and interested in joining us, let me know! The first book is AGE OF IRON by J. M. Coetzee.

Anyone that has already received this book from me as a gift or had me give it to them to read... or even just wants to read it and participate from afar... feel free to chime in virtually in the comments. Or via email. Whatever. I'll save your responses and maybe we'll read them at the club. Sort of like they do on television talk-shows "... this just in from a reader in Connecticut... Dear Kathryn: I think your taste in books sucks and you can bite me..." Okay, be nicer than that, please. But if that is the way you like to talk to people, I think I know a cab company you can work for.

Friday, September 5, 2008

Mouse in the House.

I woke up just a few minutes ago... 3:30am to a rustling in my kitchen. Not good.

I live in a VERY small studio apartment, so I can really hear every noise very clearly. And I definitely recognized the sort of rhythmic rustling that means I'm in trouble. After stomping about a bit and turning on the lights, I got the courage up to take a tennis racket and move the recycling...

... GASP...

Oh yes, my friends, that gasp was literal. And audible.

There was the unmistakable shredding and a small hole in the trash bag. Here's where I am concerned... the hole was about 3 inches off the ground. So either the cute little field mouse was wearing some sort of hovercraft device or the cute little mouse is actually a cute little rat. (And by cute, I mean NOT CUTE AND HUGE AND IN MY HOUSE!!!

So I'll take the trash out in a few hours when its a more appropriate hour to take the trash out, check the foodstuffs in the cupboard for "evidence" and then leave my landlord a note.

As of right now, I'm ready to move out. There is NOTHING that freaks me out more than large furry critters.

I am not actually sure I will be able to get back to sleep tonight.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

A Mental Break from the Political Nastiness:

WE HAVE NOT COME TO TAKE PRISONERS

We have not come here to take prisoners,
But to surrender ever more deeply
To freedom and joy.

We have not come into this exquisite world
To hold ourselves hostage from love.

Run my dear,
From anything
That may not strengthen
Your precious budding wings.

Run like hell my dear,
From anyone likely
To put a sharp knife
Into the sacred, tender vision
Of your beautiful heart.

We have a duty to befriend
Those aspects of obedience
That stand outside of our house
And shout to our reason
"O please, O please,
Come out and play."

For we have not come here to take prisoners
Or to confine our wondrous spirits,

But to experience ever and ever more deeply
Our divine courage, freedom and
Light!

~ Hafiz ~

This came courtesy of my yoga teacher. Thanks Corina!

I hope you can all take some moments away from the onslaught of right and wrong to remember that in all western languages it is standard to have the left justified.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Yet to be confirmed...



This photo had this caption:
Though she has yet to confirm her pregnancy with baby No. 2, there's no denying Naomi Watts's growing belly as she supports brother Ben Watts at the opening of his photography exhibition, sponsored by Belvedere Vodka, Tuesday at Milk Gallery in New York City.

Uh, yeah... no denying.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Hamlet 2

Funny or stupid?

I thought both, but so much of one that I enjoyed the other.

Has anyone else seen this movie.