I had an annoying trip to the dentist on Wednesday afternoon - he didn't want to use any Novacaine while I was getting my brand new shiny crown installed.
This brings to mind two things: I'm a wimp. And... I don't like pain.
I spend most of my life trying to avoid the bad parts: I don't eat bitter things, I try to be nice to people - in hopes that they'll be nice back, I take good care of my body, and I avoid as many germs as possible. (Yes, if you've ever walked through a public door with me, you've seen me pull my sleeve down over my hand so I don't have to touch the door handle.)
Now I'm not usually a pill-popper - I'd rather take a nap than an Advil if I have a headache. But there are definitely times when I want to be as medicated as possible - like when at the dentist.
I do find myself longing for some kind of euphoria on particularly bad days: when the boss is being snippy, when the guy disappoints me, when I say the wrong thing at the wrong time to someone that I care about deeply.
I guess if I were better at apologizing I probably won't want to escape quite as much. Let me practice it now: "I'm sorry."
"I'm sorry you feel that way, boss lady, I was trying my best."
"I'm sorry I expected so much from you, handsome man, I do have pretty high expectations." "I'm sorry I said that to you, you're such a dear friend and I don't want to hurt you."
We'll see how it goes. I do still secretly wish I had that Morphine pump with me to get me through the speedbumps of life.